A big shift in my healing came when I decided to plant happy seeds – literally and metaphorically. Sadness, fear and hope all mixed up together. It was a big leap of faith for me at the time…
It helped facilitate some more grieving and acknowledgment of my fears. I cried as I planted them, all the while feeling my fear of experiencing the awe of new life and losing it all again. I acknowledged my fears, and also the fact that within less than 9 months, when the snow arrived, I would be uprooting these plants. And it was an expression of my courage and commitment to continue being a creator and nurturer of new life, in spite of the risks involved. And in this case, in spite of the knowledge that I would love, nurture and then lose these plants.
I chose to start with seeds instead of full plants so that I could have a reminder that its natural to have times in our lives when it looks like nothing is happening, but under the surface, miracles are getting ready to peek out of the dirt and blossom. Seeds remind me to trust and proceed in faith even when the results don’t show up immediately.
“May the hope be the fertile soil for the sadness and fear to grow into something truly beautiful and alive…. The flower that blooms in adversity is the most beautiful and rare…” – my friend, Wilna Wardle